Jyl Barlow

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Jyl Barlow Author | Writer | Travel Guru | Publisher

Unfiltered Over-sharer & Master of Hindsight.
* Best Selling Author*
* Co-Host of Whine & Wine Podcast *
Navigating Life with Inappropriate Laughter

10/05/2026

I probably don’t want to know what happened to whomever put my orthopedic doctor an hour behind by 11:00 am but with all this new technology, can I get a heads up?

Please and thank you.

***

The ideal recipe for a rainy weekend? One set of besties settled into a house on the lake with new books, a bushel of ji...
10/04/2026

The ideal recipe for a rainy weekend?

One set of besties settled into a house on the lake with new books, a bushel of jimmies, and a group puzzle.

What’d you do this weekend?

***

Patricia Bradby Moore Karen Sboray Langley

The difference between my husband and me, in a nutshell.PS: If you haven’t tried “Paired,” you should! We’ve used the ap...
10/03/2026

The difference between my husband and me, in a nutshell.

PS: If you haven’t tried “Paired,” you should! We’ve used the app for over a year now and are still learning new things about each other…like how we’d start a love letter.

***

Have you heard of the Default Child?I’m her.There will be some who read that and bristle with anger, as if being the Def...
10/02/2026

Have you heard of the Default Child?

I’m her.

There will be some who read that and bristle with anger, as if being the Default Child is something any of us longed for.

In reality, this role is hell.

I often wonder if birth order predetermines which sibling will land as the Default Child. Maybe it’s gender? Maybe it’s personality type; I don’t know.

What I do know is that the Default Child is often the first to be abandoned, left alone to handle all the things and organize endlessly. It’s not something we ask for, but it is something we are terrified to give up, lest someone else forget to dot the i’s and cross the t’s.

We do it all, tirelessly.

We don’t want thanks; we want support.
We want help.
We want to feel like we can take a break without having to beg for a break.

Are you the Default Child?
Do you know one?

Read more about walking the path of Dementia and caretaking for a loved one in Hi, Honey! A Dementia Diary.

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Care with Kipper | Caregiving Tips
Mike Laviolette PT, DPT, OCS The Caretakers Club

09/30/2026

Nothing changes.

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09/29/2026

My husband thought I was being extra at dinner but I’m not seeing it.

***

James River Writers

09/28/2026

It may be Monday but I have no Monday Motivation.

Send help. Or a pizza.

***

Over the weekend, I attended the James River Writers Conference right here in Richmond. It may seem pretty obvious, like...
09/28/2026

Over the weekend, I attended the James River Writers Conference right here in Richmond. It may seem pretty obvious, like something I’ve done for years, since I am a) a writer who b) lives right outside of Richmond. Plot twist: this was my first time trekking to the local convention center’s halls to join hundreds of local writers taking a pause from their typewriters.

I’ve known of James River Writers for a few years but, until recently, I’d never leaned into my local writers’ community. Why? It’s a two-part answer. First, I wasn’t sure if I belonged. Second, as a recovering overachiever, I have a low-level fear of leaning into anything, lest I lean right into overfilling my commitments and calendar.

This is my habit. I find something I enjoy and lean in just a little before frantically putting my name on every single sign up sheet that lands in my email.

When I won this year’s Erma Bombeck Writing Competition, in February, I was gifted a free trip to attend the (paired) conference. I had no idea what I was getting into. I had no plans to even attend but my husband insisted that I pick up the award in person and, if I was already making that ten-hour trek, why not test the waters? I agreed with the stipulation that he make the trek with me, an appreciated added level of confidence.

Upon arrival, I quickly discovered that, rather than leaving my comfort zone, I had actually landed right in the middle of a beautiful new one. I belonged.

When I arrived back in Richmond, I made a silent pledge to dig further into local opportunities, such as James River Writers. I paid more attention to the group’s emails and offerings and the coming writers conference whose sign-up sheet sat on my desk for months as a reminder to push the button. It wasn’t that I wasn’t going to sign up, I was just dragging my feet. Then, out of the blue, an email from one of the conference coordinators: “Would you want to sponsor a breakout session? We think, Hi, Honey! (my latest, grief-tackling book) would be perfect for the “Make People Cry” panel!” The session had a much more appropriate name, of course: Honesty & Memory: Writing Truth in Memoir.

As one who firmly believes that things happen exactly when they’re supposed to, it was immediately clear why I’d been dragging my feet. “Absolutely,” I replied, “That would be absolutely perfect.”

I was sent a list of sponsor instructions and clickity-clacked away, ordering tote bag goodies (pack of personalized tissues, of course) and books for the conference bookstore. Then, I added all conference-related days to the calendar to make sure I wouldn’t miss the correct drop off day for those goodies and books. I confirmed the drop-off date, by phone, and was shocked to hear myself agree to the early hour with a “Sure! Do you want me to stay and help stuff the tote bags, as well?

I tend to have only two levels of participation: Not at All or Should I Be in Charge of EVERYTHING?” I yearn to be a person who can simply say, “Sure!” and then stop talking.

A similar thing happened at that first conference I’d attended, months prior. I showed up with zero plans beyond accepting a check and left with thoughts of how I could get involved for the next one and just how involved I could be and would I lead a breakout session or emcee the dinner or serve as a keynote speaker or build an entire hotel, by hand, to house all the writers needing lodging?

Over the weekend, at the James River Writers Conference, I had the privilege of rubbing shoulders with hundreds of gifted writers. I sat through a variety of breakout sessions, occasionally hop-scotching when there was more that I wanted to attend scheduled within the same time block. I took loads and loads of notes that will have to be sifted through in the coming weeks. I saw my books in a physical bookstore, a first for me.

I got a seat at the table and that table was specifically set up for me to sign copies of my book for attendees. I met a real-live literary agent for the first time ever and am still wondering if he thought I was as awkward as I think I was. I met a second real-live literary agent and quickly learned that finding an agent whose personality worked with mine would be essential.

I listened along as the Honesty & Memory: Writing Truth in Memoir (or Make People Cry) session began with a description of Hi, Honey! so beautiful that several gasps rippled through the room. Mom would have loved it.

Today, I am exhausted.

My feet will be achy for days as convention center floors are not made for comfort. My snooze button will likely be getting a workout all week long. My brain awaits a download that will be a mix of applying what I learned with reminders that it all doesn’t have to be tackled right this very minute.

I am exhausted, yes, but it was so worth it.

If you write, you are a writer. I truly believe that. It doesn't matter if you've been published or paid; if you write, you are a writer, and as a writer, I highly recommend dropping out of one comfort zone and into another.

James River Writers

It’s already been a busy day at James River Writers Conference! Panels, MY books in a book store, and a few book signing...
09/26/2026

It’s already been a busy day at James River Writers Conference!

Panels, MY books in a book store, and a few book signings!

It’s funny how, sometimes, you think you’re going out of your comfort zone and find yourself right in the middle of it.

***

James River Writers

Writer Friends,There’s a new PROOFREADER in town! My amazing proofreader, Tricia, has decided to take her red pen beyond...
09/25/2026

Writer Friends,

There’s a new PROOFREADER in town!

My amazing proofreader, Tricia, has decided to take her red pen beyond my little world. She has done fabulous work for me, and I am thrilled to share her talents.

Find Tricia on:
Insta: .k.zuniga
Facebook: K. Dilley Zuniga
If you'd rather email, zip me a DM, and I'll connect you.

***

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New York, NY

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