03/11/2025
This is my son Teddy. He died mere hours before he was born on the 4th of October 2025 at full term. I had a complete placental abruption, and confused its symptoms for early labour. I waited 3 hours before doing anything about it, which was already too late.
My firstborn (now 6) was delivered at 28 weeks gestation. He was severely growth restricted and spent 100 days in NICU before we got to take him home. It was because of him I started lifecasting and created this business.
For the past 5 years I have had the pleasure and privilege of meeting hundreds of families to create hand and foot casting keepsakes for them - never in a million years did I think that my professional experience in meeting and working with bereaved families who had lost babies would come in handy for my own first hand experience of exactly that.
We got to spent 9 precious days and nights with Teddy at home - something I have learned is not possible in all countries. Of course I took castings of his hands, feet, and face - and now I get 6 months of paid maternity leave. It is not lost on me how lucky I am to live in New Zealand.
Why do I share this?
I want you to see my baby and coo over him just like I did, like I do (he had been dead for 5 days in this video - he was soft and floppy, and practically perfect in every way except his heart was not beating).
I want you to remember him and to talk to me about him.
I want you to better support someone you know if they ever experience this.
I want you to know that if you are lucky enough to live somewhere that you can take your baby home, that there isn’t necessarily a rush to farewell their body, and you can spend time caring for them as you would if they were alive (dressing, bathing, cuddling, co-sleeping with them etc).
I want you to know your living children, friends, and family can meet them and rewrite their own perspective on the taboo of baby loss and the handling of a body after death.
And lastly, I want you to know that grief is not a problem to be solved, it is an experience to be carried and tended to.
If you have any questions about Teddy you are welcome to ask.
Thank you for your love ❤️