Beanies for Pediatric Brain Cancer

10/10/2022

I am sorry i really wanted to complete his story however it is just to painful. His 22 nd bday came and went as well as the one year anniversary so it has been a struggle. I have been making things still with him always at the forefront of my mind.

Here are some things we have and remember 25% of everything sold goes to willie bee foundation and caswell for kids to help other families with children dealing with life threatening illnesses.

Hats 20.00
Hat and fingerless glove set 30.00
Fingerless gloves alone 15.00

Blankets, purse, and wash clothes please contact me for price

09/06/2022

Here are completed orders going out tomorrow. I have 15 more orders now so get your Christmas orders in soon!! Remember 25% goes to Willie Bee, Caswell for Kids, and CURE!

09/06/2022

September 6

Yea this is my boy. We laughed so hard and so much. I think i kiss that most. I will tell you a story..

One night Travis asked me to make him a bologna sandwich. I made it and gave it to him. Tucked him him and said good night. The next morning i went in to check on him. He had an accident so I had to strip him and his bed. I wad up the sheets toss them on the floor by the washer and go back bath him and get clean sheets..

I return to the dirty sheets and pick the fitted sheet up. There was something in it. I look and i just cracked up so hard i was crying and very loudly. Travis is yelling whats so funny mama. I bed down and pick up… his bologna sandwich which was completely flat and saturated with urine. Omg i could not stop laughing and neither could he!!

09/05/2022

He is in a better place..
He is no longer in pain..
He is with the lord...
He is always with you..
He is watching over you..

These are the thing people say to me. I know they just don't know what to say and the truth is there is NOTHING anyone can say. None of it helps it doesn't make you feel any better. Saying nothing but showing up is more helpful. sometimes I think it would have been better if he was taken like a bandaid.. just ripped away so I didn't have to watch him go from a normal boy living his best life to the shell of that boy needing every ounce of care done for him. I do know that if he was ripped away I would says I wish I knew I wish I had time. It wouldn't matter how it happened. The fact that cancer took him is just as bad as a bandaid.
I am glad we had time. 9 month to be able to give him a lifetime in. With the help of Willie Bee we were able to do many things. We wnet to the zoo, went to the smash house, went out to a couple fabulous dinners, they rented us a wheel chair van a few times so we could go shopping and kelly took him to a safari and to the mall. We had seafood and steak dinners at home and so much more. Willie Bee started when they lost their son William to cancer when he was barley 2. Helping others going through it is their way of honoring Will and in turn I would like to give back. I don't have many skills but this one I am good at... So Beanies for Pediactric Brain Cancer was born in honor of my beautiful amazing son

09/04/2022

September 4

One year ago you gained your wings. How has it been a year since I last kissed you, touched you, hugged you. The last time you flipped me off, laughed, you just never know when it will be last of things.
Nothing is right now. The world is not right now. My heart is so shattered that I am physically ill. I am glad you are not suffering anymore but the selfish side says I would take you any way I could have you. I dont think you knew just how special you were. How many people loved you. So many people were there this night. The nurse, the nurses practioner , the oncologist, Kelly, Pam, Candice who flew up from SC ,Chris, Tylor, Greg and leitha all the way from Albany, The girls, his father, and so many more. Sharon and Dawn stopped in and brought a puppy for Travis to hold. He wasn't really conscious but when I put his hand on the pup he opened it and felt it! The last pup he ever touched. Erin and I laid with him holding him talking to him, Talking to him until he took his last breath. I was able to give him one last bath, dressed him one last time in one of his favorite shirts. I put his favorite blanket on him, I helped transfer him to the mortuary's bed. Tucked him in for the last time and kissed him for the last time... I dont know how any of made it through this night. God it hurts so much I can just barley breath. I love you so much my baby boy

09/03/2022

September 3

His surgery in June of 2017 was a full resection. 6 weeks of radiation and a full year of chemo. He was exhausted, lost his hair on the front right side, had stomach issues but laughed joked and smiled the entire time. Even when harley ( his favorite dog ) kept running in his room stealing his pillow out from under him. Oh how we laughed! He did so well and all scans came back stable. I thought he beat it. I thought he was beating it. He had almost 2 years of being stable. He got a car, got a job, went to college, got a girlfriend. He was living a very normal life. We got this…. I truly believed it.

09/02/2022

Septmber 2-
What do you mean there is a mass in his brain? Is it cancer? What do we do? I thought at the time that I could not hurt anymore them at that moment..How wrong I was. He spent 5 days in the PICU. Was put on seizure meds and sent home with a lot of appoimtments. He was scheduled for surgery in June. They wanted him to finish his junior year.

He seemed just fine after all this. No more seizures not sick at all. He just went on with life as usual. Ate well still worked out still ran still lifted weights. He was the happy smart ass kid we all new and loved.

How did we go from this to here. How can one moment in time scar you from the inside out. Like you soul was put through a meat grinder and you are left to pick up the pieces and put them back together and call it your new life. It really doesn't work. The struggle between wanting to live for the loved ones still here but leaving to go be with him is unreal. As a mother the one thing you can not role play in your head is your child dying, you just can not do it because it starts to cause a pain so great you fear you will die with just a split second thought of it. This is our reality. Mine, his sisters, his grandparents, aunts and uncles, friends, even acquaintances, all those he ever touched. We are not the same we will never be the same. As a mom, I fear living this life without him. He was my only * my favorite* son. The baby of the family. They funny guy, the sweet and caring guy, the pain in the ass guy... He IS all of that. Is not was. He may not be here now but it doesnt change what he is. How I miss you Travis. Do you know how much I love you?

09/01/2022

Here is the first of my Lizzy collection. Her favorite colors were lime green and royal blue

Hat 20.00
Gloves 15.00

The set 30.00
25% will be donated to C.U.R.E

09/01/2022

Got the first Lizzy set done. This beautiful girl was taken by brain cancer too. The link is her story. 25% of any lizzy collection purchases will go to CURE. This organization is a great resource for parents struggling with their sick child.

https://www.facebook.com/lizzysfight/

"Don't worry... be happy!"

09/01/2022

September is childhood cancer awareness month. September 4 will mark one year without my boy. I am going to try and tell his story this month and then maybe anyone reading will understand why I started Beanies for Brain Cancer.

September 1-

Im not sure where to begin. My heart and soul are shattered and I am changed forever. I guess the beginning is where it always starts but what is the beginning. The day i found out I was pregnant, the day he was born, the day I put him to breast and formed an amazing bond, or the day I heard he has a brain tumor.

Life sure turns you upside down in a split second. One moment i am hurrying the kids for school the next the school is calling me to come quick something is happening with Travis and an ambulance is on the way.

Did he take drugs.. no he wouldn’t… but he is 16 and lets be honest at 16 we are all …. Well … Stupid. Teachers and friends said no he wouldnt take drugs but what the hell is happening.

When i got there he was on the floor his eyes were just vacant

Hey sweetie its mama can you talk to me

Can you say mama

Come on baby say mama

Ill never forget that look. He was there but no-one was home. Thank god Kelly was with me and drive is to
RGH. He had had a seizure. WTF 16 years old. Took care of his body. Ate well such as fish and veggies, lifted weights every day and even mentored other boys in the gym. Loved running and biking. His principal would tell me how he would look out the window and there was Travis with a backpack on running laps around the school.

Now here we are in the hospital waiting for CT and bloodwork results. He was postictal for 3 plus hours. He was there but no one was home. I can not begin to tell you how that feels to see that look. He did manage to flip me off a few times lol. Thats my boy!

CT results… he has a mass in his right frontal lobe and we are sending you right over to strong to the PICU…. OMG WTF is happening!!!

08/31/2022

Finished this adult size set. I love this color combo!

Hat alone 20.00
Fingerless gloves alone 15.00

Set 30.00

Set is sold.
I can do create another if interested just message me

08/23/2022

The lastest creation… a childs hat and fingerless gloves set. Should fit ages 5-8 ish.

Available
20.00