03/22/2026
Last week after I sent my last newsletter, I got an unusual number of replies that all said some version of the same thing:
āWait⦠I didnāt know you were a writer.ā
Which made me laugh a little, because writing is actually the thing I thought I was going to do with my life.
In college, I studied journalism. Not casually. Not as a backup plan. I fully intended to become a professional writer.
The kind who lives in coffee shops, writes books, files stories on deadlines, and has strong opinions about fonts.
In fact, the summer after I graduated, while most of my friends were getting their first real jobs, I did something that in hindsight feels very on brand for me.
I took the entire year off⦠to write a book.
Not start a book.
Not outline a book.
Write a book.
And I did. I finished it. Every page. Beginning to end.
And then I promptly saved the document into what I can only describe as digital storage purgatory, where it has remained for the last fifteen years, never published, never printed, never seen again by another human being.
Not because I didnāt want to write.
But because I have a problem.
Actually, itās less of a personal problem and more of a hereditary condition.
I come from a very Scandinavian family, and on my momās side we have a phrase we use to describe this condition.
We call it Swedish guilt.
Swedish guilt is the very specific and very real feeling you get when you are sitting still, relaxing, doing absolutely nothing⦠while fully aware that you could be doing something productive instead.
It is the inability to enjoy peace when improvement is possible.
It is the voice in your head that says,
āYes, you could sit here⦠but you could also rebuild the entire patio.ā
Many members of my family suffer from this.
Including me.
Years ago, when I left one corporate job to pursue another, I was put on whatās called garden leave, which, for those of you unfamiliar, is a very extended period of time where you are technically still employed but not working. You are being paid to⦠stay home.ā
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ā¦and find out why girls with Swedish guilt build the best houses š«¶š»